I’ve been on both ends of human performance. I’ve been last in class and first in class – in multiple disciplines in my life – from academics to martial arts, and from business to relationships and other pursuits. Failure happens to most of us at one point or another, but it’s important to reflect on why you fail. Through the years, I’ve always wondered: “What are the key principles of high performance? Is the real key motivation, discipline, or willpower?”

The Key

Initially, I bought the idea of willpower, after all, with psychological studies that showed the environment shapes behaviour, as opposed to willpower. I also looked into the argument which takes into account childhood development: The Freudian approach.

I’ll argue that high performance boils down to multiple variables from the environment and your childhood experiences. Dan Pena makes an argument in his content that self-esteem is the key fundamental of all high-performance behaviour.

Ultimately, your behaviour boils down to your self-esteem. How much you believe you’re worth, deep down. If you believe you’re worth it, you’ll have higher expectations of both of yourself and others, you’ll have high boundaries, and you won’t take sh*t from anybody, including yourself.

The role of self-esteem

I currently run a dating consulting business and manage advertising projects for a couple of companies and individuals. In this small sample size of pursuits, it’s hard not to notice some of the self-sabotaging behaviours and lack of accountability of individuals that come through my way.