It’s a storyline you’ve seen play out in countless movies – and probably in real life, as well. A woman who has her pick of stable, emotionally available male specimens decides to go for some rugged, rebellious jerk instead. What’s the deal there? Do nice guys really finish last?
There are lots of valid reasons why women go for bad boys. In fact, some of them have to do with hormonal changes that are beyond their control (more on that later). That said, it is possible to be a good guy and still get the girl.
As a matchmaker, I am asked, “Do nice guys really finish last?” over and over again. I see lots of good guys that think nice guys finish last, but they actually don’t in the real world when it counts.
The stereotypical “alpha male” has a few advantages with the ladies: he’s a leader, someone who’s sure of what he wants (and often doesn’t ask or apologize for taking it). That, in a nutshell, is the essence of pure masculine energy, so it makes sense why women might be drawn to it. Opposites attract, after all. Still, with that alpha presence comes some negative traits as well: jealousy, aggression, insensitivity, and inability to commit, to name a few. So, while a woman might initially be captivated by a bad boy’s edge, that attraction will typically fade once she realizes he can’t give her what she wants: reliable emotional support and respect. That’s good news for all you nice guys out there.
