Being a high performer can be extremely lonely. You gain others’ admiration very quickly, but you often refrain from sharing your pride because it might be seen as boastful. You limit yourself so as not to offend or eclipse others. Ultimately, this means you are not living into what you’re capable of living into. This might lead to self-sabotage, downplaying your achievements, playing small, or even withdrawal.
The Way We Talk About Ourselves
- “I’m playing too small.”
- “I want to push myself and go big.”
- “I started feeling invincible, but for some reason, I’ve been slowing down and playing smaller.”
I’ve heard all these comments in the very first call with various clients I now coach. They are powerful leaders, entrepreneurs, real estate investors… and in response, I ask them to tell me about themselves. They tell me about their life and their previous career and inevitably, they downplay their accomplishments – and I know why.