Narcissists can be beguiling and charismatic. In fact, one study showed that their likable veneer was only penetrable after seven meetings. But you don’t want to fall in love with one. Over time you can end up feeling ignored, uncared for, and unimportant. Typically, a narcissist’s criticism, demands, and emotional unavailability increase, while your confidence and self-esteem decrease. You’ll try harder, but despite pleas and efforts, the narcissist appears to lack consideration for your feelings and needs.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) occurs more in men than women. As described in Do You Love a Narcissist? someone with NPD is grandiose (sometimes only in fantasy), lacks empathy, and seeks admiration from others, as indicated by five of these summarized characteristics:

1. Has a grandiose sense of self-importance and exaggerates achievements and talent

2. Dreams of unlimited power, success, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love

3. Requires excessive admiration

4. Believes he or she is special and unique and can only be understood by or should associate with other special or of high-status people (or institutions)

5. Lacks empathy for the feelings and needs of others

6. Unreasonably expects special, favorable treatment or compliance from others

7. Exploits and takes advantage of others to achieve personal ends