When will life return to normal? Right now, there is no clear answer to that question. The uncertainty creates feelings of dread, anxiety, and grief among all of us. It’s exhausting. It’s getting…...

What if you really loved yourself? The concept of loving yourself has lost its power to inspire us because it was overused in cheesy popular media. We are in an ironic…...

“I don’t want to be selfish.” When I hear this statement in my psychotherapy practice, I get suspicious. Often, it is code for “I’m afraid of expressing my needs.” For…...

I work with a lot of gay men. Here’s what I’ve noticed: Gay men are very busy. It takes a lot of time to: Make it at work Stay fit…...

Every week as an LGBTQ therapist, without fail, I hear stories of hurt feelings and painful miscommunication stemming from the use of technology. It’s obvious that many friends and boyfriends…...

Often in my couples’ counseling work with gay men, we uncover the underlying reason why the couple is having trouble feeling connected. We find the following unconscious belief in one…...

Many of my clients fall in love with narcissists. It’s pretty easy to do. Narcissists often are extremely charming, bright, and attractive. I call them “shiny.” Around them, we can…...

Look inside and you might find “The Outsider Trigger.” Many people fear being alone and socially isolated. However, due to early experiences of feeling different from their families and classmates,…...

I often work with clients who want to end a destructive, unhealthy relationship and are struggling with the willpower to say goodbye. These relationships can have an addictive quality, and…...

Many of my clients ask me why they are only attracted to gay men younger than themselves. If you are happy dating gay men in their twenties, then this question…...