Sometimes clients tell me that they are boring since they have no interests other than work.
“I wish I had hobbies but I just can’t seem to get interested in anything,” they say.
Or, “I’m jealous of the straight guys at work who are into guitar, Frisbee, and making craft beer.”
Some gay men have trouble figuring out what they love. As we examine this in LGBTQ affirming-therapy, sometimes we begin to understand that from a young age, what they loved was brutally shamed. If they loved Malibu Barbie, they were laughed out of the playroom. If they wanted to play dress up in costume jewelry, they drew the shades. And if they had a crush on the boy in their Cub Scout troop, they learned quickly to keep it a big secret.