There are few things more heart-warming than seeing a sweet-looking couple in their 90s holding hands and laughing together in a park, on an airplane, or standing behind you in the checkout line. The stereotype of older couples is that they’re grumpy and always nagging and snapping at each other. So what’s that happy couple’s secret?

Happy, successful relationships aren’t a fluke. I’m a marriage and family therapist in Los Angeles, and I work with many couples that want the kind of love that lasts into their 90s but don’t know how to do it. Whether you’ve been with the same partner for thirty years or you’re finding new love half a century into your life, it’s always the right time to brush up on your relationship skills. Here are 7 things you can do to make your love last a lifetime.