Many couples enter marriage with the mistaken belief that it is a ‘blissful state of life’ which will last forever. There is no greater myth than this. Living ‘happily ever after’ only happens in fairy tales. Spouses bring to their marriage union, not just love and understanding, but also their likes, dislikes, and pet peeves. Disagreements are therefore inevitable. They must be resolved expeditiously, as anger can be toxic to a marriage. Anger is the primary enemy of marital happiness. However, if handled effectively, it can make the marriage bond stronger.
Trigger Points that Create Anger:
Lack of Understanding:
If there is a lack of understanding of the basic differences between man and woman, this can create disagreement. Men and women have different temperaments. Trouble starts when one cannot appreciate or acknowledge differences, and tries to change the other person. The woman must learn that man responds differently to situations and must appreciate his cool stability in a crisis.
The man must be aware of the woman’s emotional investment in home and family and not criticize the intensity of her emotions. The competitive drive in man often exceeds that of a woman. He derives his sense of worth by being successful in his profession. He would like his wife to understand that he needs to recover from the stress of work before he can give her his full attention.
